Thursday, January 21, 2021

•phosphoric nightmare•






•phosphoric nightmare•

i know, i know i slept last night,
but i don't know where i went
caffeinated determination breeds hyperactivity
more fuel for mania induced erratic thoughts
send. help. please.
where do i plug in to erase my internal harddrive
who can i kill to unrecord these digital dreams
i'm tired i'm tired i'm tired, i'm tired of being fucking tired
if i repeat it in a smashed mirror, will restful slumber appear?
these nightmares, they are a...little...too...real
how do i counteract this adaptive innocence, where hope
keeps creeping in like the monster under the floorboards
to ravage, bruise, and claw when i am least expecting it

nervous hands, let them wring, until the screen cracks
anxious ringtones trigger all that hyperarousal
which, i know, sounds like a fun thing
can you quick, look up, and tell me,
who in the hell thought up that terminology?
i'd like a word (but sincerely, not another one of theirs)
and while we are asking impossible questions
when will all this uncashed promise come to fruition?
too little, too late, and all of my dollars short, though...
right now it might be good enough for a fistful of change

if i can bite my lip through all these smiling lies once again
tugging, between my teeth, grinding that tender flesh
until i taste the frayed color of freshly drawn blood
strolling now with false aimlessness, down
this oddly greyscale toned lightning struck beach
i will bury all my hearts in the sand, unwittingly crushed
under the feet of tourists in the mourning light, waiting here,
for the rising storm to encase my emotions in glass
as i raise my cocktail of seawater, for one last salty drink

•   •   •   •   •   •

Lack of inspiration x writer's block + nightmares = ? This, apparently.
Spellcheck says 'aimlessness' is not a word, but I'm calling bullshit on that. Aimlessness is the keyword in the theme song of my life. It is a word if I say it is. #donttrymespellcheck 

Inspired by "Digital Dreams" from @4urnotalone and using twelve of the prompts.


No comments:

Post a Comment